i just watched a film titled 'Courageous' *did i spell that right? hahaha*. it's a VERY GOOD CHRISTIAN MOVIE and is recommended for all boys and fathers in the world.
anywayyyy. what i want to write is not about the boys and fathers thingy. it's how the father letting go her daughter.
so the story was, his 9-year-old daughter died in a car accident in her way to go to her friend's birthday party. this father, very broken-hearted, at some day was successful to let go his daughter.
and this is what he said,
"God, thank You for the 9 years You gave me to spend with my daughter"
a very positive way of thinking, which i hardly can get.
btw the sentence is paraphrased, of course. i cant remember the exact words :p
i somehow always have this bad and 'regret' feeling when i am remembering how i, for several times, have failed in relationships. HAHA. im not being mellow in the middle of the night, im being honest! sometimes i cant stop regretting what ive done. i cant stop thinking 'why would i want to hurt myself. i know i was not supposed to do that, but stubbornly, i did!' or 'i was stupid' or 'i am supposed to have one relationship for one life then happy ending. no tears, no broken heart, no galau2 *hahaha*'
but life is no fairy tale and because of this film, i am now peacefully able to say this.
"God, thank You for the months or years You gave me to spend with them. the failures still hurt, but these experiences i got gave me a whole bunch of knowledge and understanding"
did i regret to meet them? now i can say 'no' without any tickling feeling in the stomach =)
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